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Wednesday, August 31st, 2005
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i have left my job so iv had lotsa free time
Div took me to the time capsule as a belated birthday present, was funny. On the way me and div shot people with super soakers again out of paul the good guys car window. After swimming we went for a Ruby House yas.
Have been out a few times with Kirsty which has actually been quite good, gettin steaming and making fools of ourselves. We went to Muppets Party at the QMU cause PD were playing. Me, kirsty and steph went and got drunko. Some guy from the navy told me he wanted to take me to the navy, and then he admitted to me and paul the good guy that he had been shagged up the bum. I fell on my arse and hit my head off a display cabinet:(
Yup anyway the endless madness that is my family. My gran is going scatty over my dad and my arguements so she put a bed in her house so i could stay there, but my mum and dad arent too happy with that so i dont kno wat to do. Graeme thinks i shouldnt go back and stay at home cause ill get more shit but then my aunt is now ment to have a brain tumor which i dont even nko if they can do anything about so i feel like staying at home would be a good idea. Im not staying at graemes anymore, i was driving him a bit mental. Meh. I pure have the feeling that i cant get anything down just now. I cant rely on anything cause its always getting fucked up.
Tonite i came home to madness again. my parents are thinking about moving to falkirk, meh. Im pure at the end of it when i think that there cant be anything else that can happen something else does. Im pure finished.
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Thursday, August 18th, 2005
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last nite i went to the pub with Euan after work, we met his girlf and kicked about the solid for a while then went up to rufus. nikki lee was there so we had a bit of a natter, she decieded shes comin to the garage with me tonite yay. I got very drunk. Euan got chucked out of the pub and I waddled back to Graemes with no ease at all cause i was so steamin, by the time i got his i thot chicken noodle soup was a good idea with i somehow poured all over my arse.
Graeme made fun of me for being a steamin mess and i fell about. Then ate hunners of food. Graeme covered my face in chocolate pudding then tried to take pictures of it. Then he had to wash it off cause i was so drunk i mite have drowned myself. I then got my self covered in blackcurrent sauce.
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Wednesday, August 17th, 2005
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Went up to Graemes and convinced him it would be a good idea to go to asda and get somethin for dinner. And then we wud go to barfly to find his mysteriously lost keys. Halfway to asda i found the keys in my pocket, im such a spastic. Anyway we went to Toys R Us and i got moody. Graeme wanted baby food. By the time we got to asda i was so hungry that i bought the most ridiculous combination of foods. I got steak pie, potato croquettes, a block of puff pastry, garlic bread, bavarian ham, garlic sausage, tikka sticks, munch bunch and blackcurrent sauce. There was the obvious me and graeme show were we cant do anythnig without gettin ragin and me huffing off cause im a spoilt wee wean. We then went back to Graemes to watch Moulin Rouge and he didnt even have it so by the time i ate my dinner i was half asleep. Pure passed out after havin all these grand plans of eating myself to death while watching shite films.
On the way to work this mornin i heard my name get shouted, it was Euan! I nearly floored him cause i ran up and hugged him. Iv not seen him in ageees, I miss college and pissing around with him and Scott. It turns out he works in the bloody post office directly accross the road which is madness. He is coming to meet me at lunch. Im gonna try and get him to come to the Mission with me after work until i go to graemes.
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Tuesday, August 16th, 2005
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Uh Oh. Im being a pure para bastard. I better check tho rather than leaving it and leaving it. I dont kno how i would feel if i was tho. Cause after being told it would never happen I dont know how id react at all. Im not stupid and wouldnt do anything stupid its just a bit like difficult to grasp. But the chances are that Im not or even if i was im incapable of dealing with it.
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oooot of the game, only words to describe my birthday, on the friday i went to the cathouse and followed dave around then went to meet graeme.
On Saturday i had to go home at an ungodly hour cause graeme started in the tattoo shop, im so happy for him. But aye went home and went straight to bed. Got up and everyone had left and i felt like shite, i even had to just take all my clothes to Graemes and get ready there. I pure wasnt in the mood by the time we left. We went to rufus to meet Rogy, it was the last time i got to be para about getting id'd yas. Rufus was shite so went went up to Daves after tryin to find it for agges. I didnt really kno anyone cept dave, graeme and rogy and they made me watch ren and stimpy so i thot i was gona fall asleep. By the time we left it was nearly midnite so i spent the first five mins of my 18th in a taxi yas\m/ Anyway got to barfly and this is where it started goin tits up. Met Jaye, Jillian and Cait and fucked about for a while. I got id’d for booze yas, just one of shels mates but knowing I was underage n shit. Anyway I got pure smacked up, iv never been so out of it in my entire life, I acted like such a spazzy and I pure couldn’t stop myself. Kirsty was in tho and I managed to cling to her most of the nite. We danced like poofs and I wandered about pure oot of it. People kept having to come and look for me cause I kept wandering about for absolutely no reason. Vinnie tried to give me 18 ric flair chops to celebrate my birthday so I had to run into the girls toilet screaming, the girls in the toilet thot I had lost it. When I think back to that night all I can do is cringe. Funny but. Obviously there was the resident spazzy but to be quite honest it doesn’t even bother me that much, the only thing that does anoy me is her falling out with the likes of kirsty, who I think is absolutely brand new, and just for her spending time with me, which is completely 12 year old core. And her getting on Graemes tits because of me. The nite went by so quickly. By the end I had sobered up slightly but I was being made fun on for being so majangled Kirsty pure gave me a big massage then we both fell asleep on the seats. Until me and graeme got a taxi back to his. I think the taxi driver possibly thot we were special needs.
Had a tough time sleeping so I got up about 11 and headed up the road. When I got home my dad pure didn’t say happy birthday to me until my mum asked him if he had..I got playboy jammies, a cute necklace and other stuff and lotso money. Tried to sleep for a couple of hours while waiting on graeme getting ahold of me so we could go see charlie and the chocolate factory in the I max. By half four he still hadnt so I headed over to his incase we missed the last showing, he was asleep an not well so we didn’t go see the film. Stayed in bed and ate curry and watched sin city. I was kinda gutted cause my day had been the birthday from hell, but it wasn’t anyones fault. Graeme surprised me with an uber chocolate cake which was amazin. I had a wee greet which he had to put up with and I felt bad about.
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| Mood: |  energetic. | | Music: | Girl From Mars. |
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I cant believe how lucky i am. Gay but still. I hate having to be looked after but its amazin to have someone who will do that for u.
The whole situation is the gayest thing ever but still it means i get to have my birthday.
Gonna meet graeme after work tonite and go to his, then tomoro while hes at work im goin to do something adunno wa yet, then we are gonna get boozed and go the barfly.
Im so excited
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Thursday, August 4th, 2005
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my mother has found my live journal so im gonna have to make it friends only i think, or make a new lj, both of which i cant be bothered with.
Porbably just go for friends only from now on, so if ur not on my friends comment and ill add you xxx
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Tuesday, August 2nd, 2005
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Meep im a very very happy person. Everything is coming together apart from this job shite.
Went into town to buy fuzzies and ended up meeting Tara so we kicked about for a while then i went home to get ready for the catty. Catty was actually not bad met up with LynDsey and lots of other people were there. After it went back to Graemes and ended up not going to work on the Monday cause i was to busy lying in bed ALL day. When i finally did get some life about me i had a wee bit of a freaky so Graeme took me for a walk which resulted in us going to the 24hr Asda ageees away and looking at the pickled items then on the way back we took a wrong turn and ended up in Govan so we thought we would take a walk over to the science centre which was all creepy at night, everything has water around it which was pretty but the needle was scarey cause it moves all the time and the entire platform its on moves which scared the bejeesus outta me. There was a massive water contraption that we played with for ages. Then we walked all the way back to graemes again, so i was really tired. Got about 4 hours sleep then had to come to work:(
But yeh im quite cheery even tho im a sad bastard, i have something that makes me soo happy and its my birthday in 5 days. BUT i hate my job and i HATE gettin up early.
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Saturday, July 30th, 2005
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The other day i tried to eat a full chicken in Kebabish, obv i didnt but i nearly died trying, then in a bid for doing something nice me an graeme went a walk up to queens park, which resulted in both of us thinkin we wud b wide and tryin to make ourselves throw up. Then after graeme did i ACTUALLY was sick everywhere, so theres both of us being sick on the flag pole and pissing ourselves laughing and the police drive by:|
Last nite i was coming home for a wee nite in and Paul convinved me to go to Helensburgh, i had to get a bus then a pure hour long train at 11.30pm. Finally got there, and it was so forum core, me and paul just ripped the arse and sat outside with the bbq. I was gonna take the spare room cause i wasnt very well and i asked ruth early on. So wen Big fuckin Jo and Greguss x machinagay tried to pump in it me and paul went upstairs and threw open the door and took pictures, yet they didnt stop the grinding, so i chucked them out pure half naked and they went into ruths parents room which resulted in some calamity. Funny and i loved the way ruth handled it tho
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Strange weekend, Long weekend.
Friday I stayed in and made chilli, was actually dead good, got the urge for bout 15 mins to go out wen switch by big will smith came on tv but i refused.
Saturday I had another lazy day until i went to Lynns, we had barbeque and did the hardcore alphabet. Her neighbours thot we were mad cause we were dancing in the kitchen. Sat on her balcony in the halmock under blankets. Anyway went out then went roun to Barfly to meet a drunk Graeme. Went back to his where he proceeded to pretend to sleep talk about having sex with boys to wind me up. Wee arse.
Sunday lazed around then went to Vinnies for wrestling pay per view. Some prositute staretd shouting at us in the street cause she thought i was growlin at her. Me, Graeme and Vinnie went to Kebabish where they got baby chickens, which is basically a full chicken done in amazing spices and barbecued or soemthing. It tasted amazing, pure been lusting after one ever since. I got a San Wah which was PURE MINT. Startin to get into the wrestling which worries me more than anything. I started to feel not well during it tho.:( Anyway went back to Graemes at some ridiculous hour.
On Monday i didnt go to work cause i didnt feel well, i stayed in graemes bed and barely moved. Him and Div were going out to the garage tho, so i deiceded just to stay at graemes cause i wasnt well. Div came up and we had a wee natter before they went out. I watched gregorys girl...kind of, i fell asleep. Pure confused when i woke up mid morning and Graeme was coming in.
On tuesday i didnt go to work either. yas.
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Im soooo tired, stayin in this weekend and eating chilli.
Oh aye my birthday 6th August Fireworks @ Barfly cause its mint.
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Yesterday I was ment to be taking Graeme for dinner, was gonna take himt o the pure swank HO WONG. I met him in town and dragged him to hellfire, on the way we ran into Div who was gaggin for China Buffet King, so the Ho Wong was out the window. Div knows ALL the staff in China Buffet King and they pure love him pure happy hour prices and chat and they all go 'david, david' its so cute. I just sat like :| So aye sat in CBK for two hours with Graeme and Div then headed down the Barfly with them cause they were working, ended up kicking about there cause jack showed up. Got pure abused, went to meet up again with jack and go to the catty but she never showed up so i just went and got mccdonalds and went back round to the barfly to get Graeme. Went up to his and got the sorest stomach ever so i had to pure sit in a funny position for like an hour, he was dead good with it tho, pure refused to go to sleep and just sat and talked to distract me. He told me what we'r doing on my birthday:D its gonna be good
Yas me and Div are goin to the Time Capsule on Wed.
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Wednesday, July 20th, 2005
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I feel really good, pure sorted and shit which is amazin. Best iv felt since i lost my job an shite. Actually best iv felt since back six months into me and richard being together, my stability was a complete downward spiral from there. This isnt a dig at ric, before any of his little queers go and start telling him stuff, since obviously my entire life revolves around tryin to get his attention *rolleyes* but this is how i feel.
Big Forbes is coming to pick me up and take me for lunch since he has to bring me my shoos. Goin to graemes tonite. :)
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Got my fairy pictures well some of them, the professional ones neway, the non-professional are better.
On friday i met Claire and Kat and we went to the pub. Jamie-lee, Kelly and some other burd showed up, i proceeded in my attempt to get drunk as me and Claire were ment to be going to the catty. But she ended up going home so i went myself, was drunk by the time i got there and wee shiv was awaiting to buy me booze, evil little witch:p I ended up making a concoction myself involving Vodka, lemon, lime and tropical sours, i thot it was disgusting but everyone else thot it tasted like dib dabs. Danced about and got comandeered by a random forumer, arm wrestled wae big pete. Good times. After the catty i went round to the barfly and then went home with graeme.
On Saturday me and Graeme went up to my house, much to his disapproval. He met my aunt and uncle which he was greetin about aswell. lol. He played with my baby kitten, Cute. I drank pickle juice yas. Anyway went into town to go for dinner but by the time we got there it was nearly eleven an everything was shutting, we eventually decieded just to go for indian. And went to the ASSMAN:| I got the pure most expensive thing and didnt like it. But there was a couple in the corner having a big arguement which was banter. Ran into stef, who was being a massive arsehole and was convinced he never did anything wrong the other week, most unexpected thing ever, seeing him, i was scared graeme mite snap, he looked ragin as fuck. Then walked over to the quay and saw batman which was actually really good, apart from the incompetant odeon staff who are so curteous in their manner of talking to you while shoveling full hot dogs down their traps. Classy. Walked to graemes after it, pure bumped into brodley and kelly 2.30 in the morning core.
On sunday a big lazy day. Stayed in bed and watched pure gash films Constantine which was rubbish, then an unhealthy amount of the A-Team (2 eppisodes). Then Team America which i got bored of cause its humour was the most childish, blatent load of nonsense ever. THEN we watched show girls which was terrible and full of boobs. Then i fell asleep.
On monday i was off cause it was the glasgow fair which was amazin kicked about, Brian picked me up and convinced me it would b a good idea to go up his for a while for a curry, decieded i would for a wee hour, resulted in me near falling asleep then the 'conversation' the pure evil one that usually reswults in most of the male population hating me. He took me home an i went to sleep again
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Thursday, July 14th, 2005
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Was standing outside the barfly on tues waiting on graeme when the bassist from Amen came up to me and asked if id go to their gig if they guest listed me. It was very flattering.
So i went to the gig like a good little groupie. Met Paul and Raymo and got paul in for free with me, also managed to skip the entire que yas. The psoters said that Psyko Dalek were still playing which was a bit mad and confused us all until we got downstairs and the old Pysko Dalek line were playing:| After all the arguing, funny really Paul and Raymo looked so shocked, it was hilarious. Was standin with graeme wen the amen bassist clocked me, and started the chat, easily amuzed man that he is. The gig was ok casey chaos kicked some wee fan in the head which was pretty good. Stood about and waited for graeme to finish, him and div ruined my chances of finding a new man by proclaiming that graeme is my boyfriend :( Me and graeme had a wee chat aswell and now i feel a tad better about things, we went to the catty where i got praised for my hotness yas, fans. Only stayed for one drink had a wee banter with claire and Kat then went back to graemes for sleepy.
Tonite im just gonna stay in and eat a curry and have an early nite so i can go out tomoro. I think catty with Ms Clarise is on the cards.
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Friday
Went into town after work to meet stef, pothead clo and tom for toms birthday. Everything was goin fine until i went round to barfly to see graeme. I asked stef to watch ma bag and wen i got bag he was gone and so was my bag. I thot it was a joek at first cause why would he lift my bag? So i phoned him, he told me he thot i had left(even tho i said ill b back in a min) and he was on the bus, so he said he would come back to town as everything was in my bag and i had no money or nethnig on me. Stood outside osmosis for 2 hours with pothead and clo as tom was oot his nut and went to the solid. So after like 2 hours still no stef. I tried phonin him repetadly and no answer, i think he was hanging up. So we gave up and went round to get tom since he is stefs flat mate and mite hav been able to shed some light, but hwas still oot his tree. So we started walkin to the bus stop so i cud use the phone cause i was pure hysterical by this time, none of them had enuf money for me to go with them and i really didnt wana see stef after wat he had did. Tom and pothead basiacally told me the reason they thot stef had took my bag was to get me up to his so id have sex with him or watever, which made me feel even sicker. Ment to be my mate n shit, pure ruining my nite, cause i was ment to b goin to the catty then to Graemes. While in the phone box, some burd ran up and basiacally tried to drag me out of it to phone an ambulance, her made was a pure smack heid and was oding outside. She must have been about the same age as me and i saw her turn blue and die on the road, it was really scary. Really made me re-think ever taking drugs again. When she died she went a dunny colour, and her stomach began to swell, an all the people about us were arguing wether to put her in the recovery or flat on her back cause it was O.D. so they were all tossing her about and she was blatently dead. Fuckin yucky, me and clo were pure:| So aye i phoned graeme cause by this point i was really upset, i didnt want to go to stefs cause i didnt kno how to get back and it was obvious the reason he wanted me up, but i had no money, no phone, no jacket, make up nething. Graeme was brilliant ONCE AGAIN. he told me to go roun barfly and he gave me money and told me to go out then come back at 3 and we would go get my bag. So i went to the catty. Clairise was there and i got some banter and hilarious dance moves from steven(sp?) and we downed some black after shock resulting in me wobbling down to barfly at 3, by this point i didnt want to deal with stef, but we went anyway, took us ages to find the place. And wen we did no answer, gayness. So just wet back to graemes where i was so drunk i had to b carried up the stairs:s
Saturday
Had to go into town to get my bag which stef left at borders(lovely boy). Fuckin meh. Went home and dyed my hair black. Went into town to meet Gia cause iv not seen her in ages, we went to the catty pure old skool style. Big G was there wae Big Rog, they both bullied me, Me and Gia got down to old skool tunes, then she left and Rog and Graeme continued to harass me, graeme was beating me up, then rog was defending me then beating me up and puring drink on me:( Big steamin Graeme, now there is a sight to be seen, i worryingly find it cute tho..The fuckin heat in the catty was unbearable, i pure had to strip down. Went to subway which was even roastiner, had an in depth conversation about me being a nutbag and not listenin to good advice, which is about rite, then sat on the wall outside graemes cause i take 5 million years to finish a fag supposidly.
Sunday
Had to get up at the fuckin crack arse of dawn cause pysko dalek were practising and Graeme has joined the band. Went home for a wee while and met Brian on route who was doing some fire breathing stuff on buchanan street for charity even tho he is still a crippie and burnt himself pretty badly. Anyway went to the PD gig, had a really bad time, i dont want to talk about why, Im just sick of this entire thing, bout <-> this close to just saying shuv it. Pure blew off and ended up sitting in the back stairs, jonny found me and was nice, but i still felt shite. Sick of feeling like an arsehole.
Ever have something, and u kno its bad for u, but u cant give it up? aye
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Been having alot of wee kinda blackouts, spposidly they are panick attacks. Worst one was wed, pure freaked rite out. Graeme managed to convince me to go up to his which was good cause he knew exactly wat to do. Just hugged me and put on a film and calmed me down. Ate a big greasy chinese mmmm.
On thurs after work i went to meet Shiv we went down to osmosis and met stef on the way, had a few games of pool (i am a shark) then as stef was leaving a coupl of guys came over and asked if they could play doubles with us. They were from the shetlands and just couldnt stop introducing themselves cause they were steamin 'hi ma name is keallllvvviiiinn, am fae the sheeeetttlllannnddds' Nealry ended up at the catty wit us:| So aye went to the catty, was just a tad shite.
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Wednesday, July 6th, 2005
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fuckin hell, turns out liam donaghy works in my work, mental. Went out with him in like 1st or 2nd year. Glasgow is so bloody small.
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